Gone Fishing

After the last couple of weeks of stress, we decided it would be a good idea for the family to go fishing for the weekend. I'm not entirely sure what I was thinking, as the last time I went fishing Jimmy Carter was President, but I agreed to the plan.

The SO and our good friend GW left towing the boat Thursday night; I was to pick up the girls from school Friday and meet them at the lake. It was to be a relaxing family-type weekend of sun and fun.

But first, I had to take them to the movies; somehow I had been maneuvered into a promise to take them to see "The Last Mimzy". The little buggers held me to that promise with a steely determination that is to be much admired.

For those of you with more than one child, you know that when they are hell-bent and presenting a united front to get what they want, it's a tough row to hoe. I swear, if they were put in charge of US Foreign Policy and told that getting our troops out of Iraq would earn them candy or a Bratz doll, the war would be over in less than three days.

As much as I tried to twist out out of it, they had a good comeback and never once whined. They are getting very clever in a way that makes parents start losing sleep and looking over their shoulders with a nervous tic. But hey, I'm not proud; I gave in. The movie was pretty good, though.

I then had the pesky task of buying a fishing rod for The Princess. Not just any old pole would do for her Majesty; we had to spend 35 minutes picking out the right color. What can I say, she is my child. I KNEW she wasn't the slightest bit interested in actually catching a fish, but she still had to have the best on offer. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

Finally, we set off on the road; me, The Princess, The Teenager and The Movie Star (so called because she swans around quite dramatically like a '40's starlet - if we would have let her pack a silk headscarf, feather boa, or ballet shoes a la Audrey Hepburn to wear while angling, she would have).

They had the ginormous bucket of $20 popcorn left-over from the movie riding in their laps. After multiple pit stops to get rid of the $20 giant keg of Coke they had consumed, we arrived at the lakehouse just in time to go to bed! Hurrah! I gratefully fell asleep on the couch with my shoes still on.

Saturday was glorious; GW is an early bird and got up and made the girls breakfast and let me have a lie-in; I knew there was a reason he was our friend! They plonked down in front of the TV while he and the SO got their gear ready and I dragged my sorry butt out of bed. The boys took off in the boat and we girls wandered down to the pier. We said hello to the grizzled old men perched on the shore and set up camp.

Three and a half hours later, there was still no fish caught. The Princess had long since thrown down her pole, declaring fishing "stupid" and was happily immersed in her Naruto book. She was content that she had hooked The Teenager's hair by accident, causing much commotion, and that was the "catch of the day" as far as she was concerned.

The Movie Star flitted up and down the pier chatting to anyone who walked by and happily posed for photo-ops; she was much more interested in what the breeze was doing to her coiffure (she was without the aid of her silk headscarf) and squealed like a banshee over every bug that came remotely near her personal boundary of 100-feet-in-any-direction.

Thankfully, The Teenager actually likes fishing. She approached the task at hand with serious intent and massive patience. Suddenly, she started catching fish. I was alarmed, as I had not seriously believed she would actually snag one. The grizzled old men wandered over to comment on her skill, which is quite a compliment.

However, her skill ended at the catching and she didn't know what to do with the gasping fish at her feet. I was forced to shed the years of chic urban cosmopolitan living I had built up as a protective shell and revert back to the country girl I grew up as. Yeehaw!

As I held down each flopping brim she wrested out of the lake, getting stuck by their sharp stabby fins and wrenching the hooks from their mouths with a pair of pliers while their blood splurted all over my shoes and the two little girls screamed in disgust, I realized I was having a great time.

I sure hope they remember that day as fondly as I will.