A Most Unexpected Outing

J.K. Rowling, the author of the Harry Potter series, revealed on Friday that she "always thought of Dumbledore as gay" during a book reading at Carnegie Hall in New York. In answer to the question was the Headmaster of Hogwarts ever in love, she didn't even pause before propelling him out of the closet at high speed!

This is depressing news, for me anyway, as it just goes to prove my gay friends right yet again. I can't tell you how many conversations I've had that have spooled out along the lines of ....

Me: (admiringly)
I loved Viggo Mortensen in A History of Violence, he was really go-

Gay Friend: (interrupting)
He's gay!

Me: (irritated)
No, he's not!

Gay Friend: (gleefully)
Yes, he is!

Me: (irritated)
How the hell do you know?

Gay Friend: (smugly)
I have a friend, who's a friend of a friend of the concierge at the Chateau Marmont in LA, who said his boyfriend's ex-lover's mate shagged him last year.

Me: (amazed)
What in the hell are you talking about!? You believe that crap?

Gay Friend: (insistent)
He's gay, I'm telling you. I've heard.

Me: (annoyed)
Look, just cause you want him to be gay doesn't make it true. You say everyone in Hollywood is gay anyway!

Gay Friend: (smug again)
Oh, honey, that's because they are.

Me: (incredulous)
You're seriously telling me Tom Hanks is gay?

Gay Friend: (sincerely)
Yep.

Me: (amazed)
And Clint Eastwood? And Stephen Spielberg? And Jack friggin' Nicholson?

Gay Friend: (happily)
Gay! Gay! Gay!

Me: (disgusted)
You're insane.

Gay Friend: (comforting)
The truth hurts, girlfriend, the truth hurts.

Over the years, I've had this sort of conversation about many, many celebrities with many, many gay men, and dagnabbit if the gay boys aren't correct more often than not! To be fair, quite a few worked in the entertainment industry, so I guess they are closer to the ground as far as that kind of thing goes (so to speak). And yes some of the celebrities in question are kind of obvious, even to a straight girl. Clay Aiken immediately springs to mind, and not just because you can call him "Gay" Aiken for a cheap laugh.

As for Albus Dumbledore, I was informed last year he was obviously homosexual. I didn't get that from reading the books, but a gay friend told me all the signs were there and I refused to believe him. The truth hurts, girlfriend, the truth hurts.

Now, if someone tells me Mike Rowe plays for the other team, I'm really gonna scream.