The Morman Rap
I know ya'll think I'm unhealthily obsessed by religion and maybe that's true.....
Oh all right, it is true, I confess. I ask you for forgiveness and you, dedicated reader, are required by most religious tenets to do so; done deal! Now let's move on, shall we?
At least today it's not about the extremist Christian whackos who get under my skin like chiggers; no, it's much more fun than those dour harbingers of doom.
(/cue M.C. Hammer's You Can't Touch This)
It's Mormon Time!
I came across this gem on good old YouTube and had to share it; it is the absolute polar opposite to anything produced by 50 Cent. Jumping Jehovah!
Just look how far "rap music" has come since Grandmaster Flash and "The Message"!
Is it just me, or do the singers on that backing track sound just like Donnie and Marie? In the interest of full disclosure, I used to lurve me some Donnie and Marie Show back in the 70's. I still own all The Osmond Brothers albums and enjoy nothing more than singing "Paper Roses", in full operatic voice, to aggravate my children.
As I've posted before, Big Love is my fave show on TV, and right now I'm all about those lovable, cheerful, perky, relentlessly upbeat in nature, really-kind-of-weird-to-the-rest-of-us Mormons! The Husband and I even watched a very dry documentary on PBS the other day about the history of the LDS church. It was pretty interesting - I had no idea it was such a "new" faith, and that they got massacred quite often in their earlier days (by the US Government no less) for being heretical polygamists. That does go some way to explaining why they still feel so persecuted as a group today, I guess.
And it had not yet sank in to my over-caffeinated skull, until watching this clip, that Mormons don't drink Coke, Pepsi, or especially, heaven forfend, the official drink of the South, Mountain Dew! Golly!
4 comments:
I saw a fakumentary on IFC today about Magic Mormon Underwear.
*snort*
Lord says:
visit www.radiopatata.blogspot.com
Mahala - ooooh, will have to go look! You mean they *aren't* magic? D'oh!
God - Agradece por el acoplamiento; ¡Necesito aprender cómo leer a españoles para entenderlo completamente, aunque manejé espigar de lo que hablabas en el poste sobre el masturbation!
¡Divertido!
Yes, I am the extremely white and nerdy guy who made that clip.
Just to clear up a couple of things, it's not exactly true that we wacky Mormons don't drink caffeinated sodas. We officially don't drink coffee or tea because of a doctrine called the Word of Wisdom. However, some church members decide to abstain from caffeinated sodas on principle because of the caffeine. Since the point of the cheesy rap is to paint a caricature of me being a good stereotypical Utah Mormon boy, it therefore follows that I would go the extra mile and avoid caffeine altogether. In actuality I don't tend to buy caffeinated sodas or drink them, but I have in the past (I like Cherry Coke and Mountain Dew) and I have no qualms about it. The whole concept of committing sin by drinking Coke is sort of a running joke with Mormons. Almost a little controversial sometimes, in the right company. If you really want to open up a can of worms though, start up a discussion with a group of Mormons about whether or not it's okay to watch certain rated R movies.
Anyway, just thought I'd spread some knowledge around. We Mormons like to make fun of other Mormons and ourselves a lot. I certainly hope you don't run into a member of the LDS Church who you'd categorize as an "extremist Christian whacko". I'm not particularly fond of extremists either. Sometimes I have to bust out my Magic Underwear on them. :-P
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